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“Hey Google, what are the chances of winning the lottery,” and the results should send you running for the hills.  While your chances of getting struck by lightning may be greater than striking it rich in the lotto, people win big at finding LOVE on a fairly regular basis.  Right now, there are countless people celebrating it, cursing it or searching for it. And who can blame them? Love is a many splendored thing.

So, today we are sharing one (of many) of our favourite Love Stories with you.  Our story comes from August 2013 and our Prince Charming grand slam.

“I was happy with my first date but Jane insisted I meet Bert! Jane came to my house on a summer morning in August 2013, and we sat on my sunny deck barefoot and talked about my life for two hours; she met my dog, my kids, and she saw how I lived. I chose Jane because from what I knew about her, and that she would do the work for me and I didn’t need to share my photo and profile with the world, just Jane and her team.  It wasn’t too long after she called with an introduction for me, John and after a first meeting I found him as I thought, to be exactly who I was looking for, until intro #2.  Jane insisted that I meet Bert, I think she knew he was my perfect match, and she was right! Our cocktail date moved onto dinner and we met again the next day…….and forever after that.  Bert proposed to me in Bora Bora, 14 months later and we got married August 2016, exactly 3 years after our first date.  We are a match made in heaven and thanks to Jane she brought me my Prince!”

 

You know the old saying: you win some, you lose some… and then there’s that little-known third category…..as quoted by  Al Gore

Most of the people I meet who are venturing back into the dating world have no idea what they want in a partner.  Oh, don’t kid yourself they have a list a mile-long of qualities and traits that they are certain they will not tolerate again but the one thing they have a hard time telling me is what they are looking for.

For some, not having a clue of what they wanted in a partner has in the past lead to some epic dating adventures. Simply because they have either given everyone a chance or let some good ones pass them by, meeting several colorful personalities with whom have developed into platonic friendships, along with a handful of whack jobs that had them thinking of never dating again. Starting to sound familiar?

Thru all this trial and error, they discover what it is that they are actually looking for – someone to do nothing with. The concept of having someone to do nothing with should not be confused with having nothing in common. Having nothing in common generally equates to having separate interests, which often leads to having separate lives. But hear me out.

Having someone to do nothing with is finding someone to spend your unscheduled moments with — the person you share the comfortable silence with when you’re driving, or the one you lean against when you’re on the couch surfing Pinterest for dinner ideas.  They’re the one that you enjoy your morning cup of coffee with, or the one that chats with you while you’re folding laundry.

They’re the person in your world that makes your everyday living moments better simply because they’re in your presence.  While I’m an advocate for date night and the important role it plays in a relationship, I have come to realize that most neglect the importance of finding someone that simply wants to be with them — no activities, no schedules, just enjoying the company of one another.

While you still might be tempted to have more “Netflix and Chill” nights, as the temperatures rises, endorphins spark as the sun comes out; so, does your desire for a relationship.  There is something about the days getting a little longer brings us all out of the woodworks and we are seeing a surge in singles wanting to put themselves out there to meet someone,

As spring falls upon us there are still do’s and don’ts when it comes to meeting the right kind of match, based on what you’re looking for and here are a couple of steps you can follow to meet your Spring Love;

DO lose your “laundry list”; This doesn’t mean go out with anyone who asks, but your perfect partner is never 100 percent of what you think is perfect for you that you’ve put on a piece of paper. Date smart, but date with a balance of openness.

DON’T TMI; As relaxed as you are with this great first date, trust me that he’d rather not hear about your alcoholic mother who has a bad habit of continuing asking you for money. As interesting as you think he finds it, it’s because he wants to get to know as much as possible since this is probably the last time he will see you.

DO keep it simple, stupid; Stop trying to complicate things that are not. Relax, stop overanalyzing and putting unfounded pressure on your first few dates. You’re not getting married, you are on your second date.

DON’T try too hard; Put your best foot forward, work on yourself, but remain humbly confident. Don’t ever try to be something you are not in order to try to make someone like you. No one’s perfect. Be your best YOU that you can be, and you will find that right person who loves you for you, flaws and all.

After reading these DOs and DON’Ts are you be ready to meet your Spring Love?

 Contact me jane@matchmakerforhire.com

 

“hope springs eternal meaning, definition, what is hope springs eternal: said when you continue to hope that something will happen, although it seems unlikely.”

 

There’s something about her that is is self assured, unpredictability exciting and you will want to meet her.  If you are 60+ Gent, living in Victoria and have a curious mind and lots of gusto contact me — jane@matchmakerforhire.com or call 778-552-3350

 

Testimonial: “You sure know me. I can only imagine the demands in matching algorithms…… You must be the Einstein of Love.” He said smiling. That’s what one of our clients recently had to say.

Is there a formula for successful relationships?  You bet! The five-to-one ratio of positive-to-negative emotions suggests there is and the difference in having found “the one” as apposed to “someone” can be:

  • You are so enamored at the beginning that you want to keep conversing forever
  • You find someone who meets 90% of your criteria (having defined this well up front and relating to what you have in common rather than having more positive “opposite” traits).
  • There is a magnetism after the first couple of dates…. coming from both head and heart and not merely lust, though the physical attraction is also there.

Once established well over months where it keeps existing—this magnetism blossoms to where you can’t live without the other person.  Resist the desire for any next steps until 4 seasons have gone by, and you have experienced visitations with her/his friends and family, seen his/her reactions to a large variety of events such as changes in political climate, religious experiences, movies and intellectual pursuits, passions of many kinds, discussions on health, patterns of living, rural or urban style, future plans, desire for travel, views on children, volunteering, helping others—all topics you can bring up…and many more that give a broader perspective about the person. Satisfy your need to know these things to avoid big future controversies.

 

Matchmaker vs. Cupid: Which one do you choose when it comes to finding love?  Would you rather get a visit from the messenger of love or a Matchmaker superhero who can save you from a dating disaster?  

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!

 

If she is a fan of the team, I don’t see why not – however normally I’d see it as a bad move, but all depends on how comfortable she is with it and if she’s excited to go then ……it’s a good move!

With FIRST DATES, there should be 3 components to it.  You need to take some time and create a plan.

Dinner –not a good first date plan.  If you decide 15 min in you have zero in common you are stuck for an hour or more and you’ve giving a message that you have carved the whole evening for someone, you hardly know.  Its like having 2/3 of the date all upfront.  So guys, here we go!

  • The first 1/3, quick easy drink in a bar,
  • and next 1/3 do something fun that is easy and risk free, and it also shows that she thinks that you’ve earned it. (if you are finding conversation awkward at a sporting event, trust me, it wouldn’t be any better at a dinner)
  • and last 1/3, this is reserved for dinner. It makes it easier to have known each other previously and are already comfortable around each other and you’ll always have a bailout conversation topic, because you can just revisit and talk about whatever you did on the first and second dates.

Even if she’s not a big sports fan, she’s sure to enjoy a laid-back evening or afternoon at a minor league ball game.  Amateur teams tend to have more entertainment during the game, which will provide you with tons of conversation starters.  Plus, the drinks and food won’t cost and arm and a leg which is especially good news if things don’t pan out.

 

Thanks to Steve Darling and the Vancouver SportsNet 650 morning team for having me on the air today!

 

 

Thanks to Mariah Carey and uncomfortable relatives around the festive table to have a lover at Christmas, it is the most popular time of year for singles to go searching for that special someone. Sleigh bells are ring ting tingling and for singles its time to pull out your best lines and get out there.

Now if you cave in to the cries of the dating massive, true love probably isn’t in the cards.  Matchmaking ensures you’re only exposed to like minds and people who meet your criteria. You don’t want to waste your time with someone who’s not even verified, do you? Think of how much better it will be if both you and your partner come recommended; verification that you are both important and deserving of love.

There’s plenty to celebrate about good relationships, but in a world where being single makes you feel like an oddity its time to change the focus.  Make this year the year there will be NO moping about your marital status, NO joining the festive Christmas-y stampede in the bedroom, just make the most of your alone time while it lasts.  Our clients say; once they found The One, there’s no going back to the luxury of being completely selfish, so enjoy some rum spiked noggy for the duration of the holidays.

A Partner isn’t just for Christmas – it’s for LIFE.

 

 

 

The couple that’s together and you don’t recall a time of them being on their own.  That couple whose personalities are either too similar to too different.  That couple that, from the outside looking in don’t look like they might fit but they just do.

In order to say two people as a couple, are perfect for each other, we have put together a few phrases we have heard over the years to express they are a perfect match to each other.

  • A couple that “has good chemistry” gets along really well.
  • A “compatible” couple fit together really well.
  • A “power couple” are a couple that together, can do anything.
  • A “cute” couple look good together.
  • A couple that is “equally attractive” have a similar level of attraction. (Both members are attractive, or unattractive, etc.)
  • A “good-looking” couple implies that the members of the couple are both independently attractive. (Hot, Sexy, Attractive all same meaning!)

 

IF you or someone you know is a Gent in his 60’s or 70’s, living in Canada or the US with goals for yourself and want to be with a woman who has goals for her own life too, then read on……and contact me at jane@matchmakerforhire.com 

At every Olympics event you see a series of athletes battle it out for gold. But away from the track, the sporting heroes are also rumored to be competing for each other .  Sound Familiar?

Despite all your great intentions you feel you are continually falling short of your expectations and its’ negatively impacting you finding a love connection despite your willingness to have a relationship?

With the thousands of singles, we frequently meet we decided to analyse some of today’s dating behaviors and outline better winning performances that are needed to go the distance to be fearless in dating.  Nothing better than us bringing in the winning coach to help! Coach Rams’ approach breaks things down from a coach’s perspective and together we will define ways to help you apply it to a pursuit of LOVE.

Join me on Thursday October 12, 2017, 7-9pm, at our Vancouver Yaletown location.  Limited seats for the 1st of our complimentary Q&A series.

 

 

Meet Coach Ram Nayyar.  He has over 20 years + of it. –Canadian Olympic Coach and Best-Selling Author (The Sport of Life).  Coach Ram will show you that no matter what is stopping you, fearlessness is always the way forward.  He is an Olympic Level Coach and mentor, advisor and guide to elite and developing athletes, C-Suite Professionals and High-achieving learners, published author, motivational speaker and gifted storyteller; a unique blend of Western Practicality and Eastern Philosophy to drive an active process that helps his clients acknowledge, work through and ultimately overcome the fears that are holding them back from uncovering and achieving renewed motivations, success and happiness.

 

 

 

 

To concluded with some fun facts; surveys have  compared the success rate of pick-up lines at the games, revealing who won Gold, Silver and Bronze for their engaging chat up lines.

Scoring gold was Portugal. The most commonly used line was: “Hello, have I told you you’re a princess?”  

Spain took silver with the opening: “I’m sorry, but I could not resist your beauty.”

And USA took bronze, going with the line: “OMG, I’m speechless.”

Contact me, jane@matchmakerforhire.com  today to reserve a spot. We want you to succeed in dating!

 

Social media has changed peoples lives in the ways in which people ask each other out.  Apparently, asking for a phone number is over.  Why? Because people ask for social media info instead!

Even so, recent studies claim the phone call is more intimate than friending someone on Facebook, nobody makes phone calls you just get their phone number to text them, seems to be the new 1st base for singles!  That’s a whole other story! Take note, once you send a text or a photo, it’s sent and forever tied to your digits. Hold that thought, there are other options, check out our friends at “QTeeApp”   http://www.qteeapp.com/   (watch for next blog post).

So, here’s what I have found; there’s a problem when you start digging into others social media and you immediately learn too much about someone and it’s an early turnoff overlooking a chance to get a vibe with you before you dig in too much.  Many singles have shared their online dating stories with me and some say they keep like a dossier on people and then they immediately decide if that person is not for them.  I find that just wrong!  Remember social media representation of the people putting themselves out there, really isn’t an accurate representation of who they are.  Sometimes you build a sense of that person, when you haven’t had a conversation with them, haven’t met them in person, and there is no sense of who that person is and you’ve written them off, without giving them a chance.

Take into account that most people have an idealized life that they post and people don’t put their real lives online, so I am a firm believer you need to see someone, smell them, need to know them; that’s part of what you learn about somebody!  Living proof, The Waiter Rule; You can tell a lot about a person by the way he or she treats the waiter and being rude to waiters ranks No. 1 as the worst in dining etiquette.  You may save yourself a lot of future problems by more “dining out” first dates.

I always encouraged my clients when I send them a profile match that you can’t speed up the process of getting to know that person on paper, you have to do it in person (unless you’re really not looking to hook up) and the reality is you can’t rush it, you have to take the time.

So, still thinking of going ONLINE “Communicating for FREE this Easter weekend and see where it takes you – it’s an Easter weekend of opportunity!” …….. Or is it…….!!!

What do you think?