Testimonial: “You sure know me. I can only imagine the demands in matching algorithms…… You must be the Einstein of Love.” He said smiling. That’s what one of our clients recently had to say.

Is there a formula for successful relationships?  You bet! The five-to-one ratio of positive-to-negative emotions suggests there is and the difference in having found “the one” as apposed to “someone” can be:

  • You are so enamored at the beginning that you want to keep conversing forever
  • You find someone who meets 90% of your criteria (having defined this well up front and relating to what you have in common rather than having more positive “opposite” traits).
  • There is a magnetism after the first couple of dates…. coming from both head and heart and not merely lust, though the physical attraction is also there.

Once established well over months where it keeps existing—this magnetism blossoms to where you can’t live without the other person.  Resist the desire for any next steps until 4 seasons have gone by, and you have experienced visitations with her/his friends and family, seen his/her reactions to a large variety of events such as changes in political climate, religious experiences, movies and intellectual pursuits, passions of many kinds, discussions on health, patterns of living, rural or urban style, future plans, desire for travel, views on children, volunteering, helping others—all topics you can bring up…and many more that give a broader perspective about the person. Satisfy your need to know these things to avoid big future controversies.

 

Matchmaker vs. Cupid: Which one do you choose when it comes to finding love?  Would you rather get a visit from the messenger of love or a Matchmaker superhero who can save you from a dating disaster?  

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!

 

If she is a fan of the team, I don’t see why not – however normally I’d see it as a bad move, but all depends on how comfortable she is with it and if she’s excited to go then ……it’s a good move!

With FIRST DATES, there should be 3 components to it.  You need to take some time and create a plan.

Dinner –not a good first date plan.  If you decide 15 min in you have zero in common you are stuck for an hour or more and you’ve giving a message that you have carved the whole evening for someone, you hardly know.  Its like having 2/3 of the date all upfront.  So guys, here we go!

  • The first 1/3, quick easy drink in a bar,
  • and next 1/3 do something fun that is easy and risk free, and it also shows that she thinks that you’ve earned it. (if you are finding conversation awkward at a sporting event, trust me, it wouldn’t be any better at a dinner)
  • and last 1/3, this is reserved for dinner. It makes it easier to have known each other previously and are already comfortable around each other and you’ll always have a bailout conversation topic, because you can just revisit and talk about whatever you did on the first and second dates.

Even if she’s not a big sports fan, she’s sure to enjoy a laid-back evening or afternoon at a minor league ball game.  Amateur teams tend to have more entertainment during the game, which will provide you with tons of conversation starters.  Plus, the drinks and food won’t cost and arm and a leg which is especially good news if things don’t pan out.

 

Thanks to Steve Darling and the Vancouver SportsNet 650 morning team for having me on the air today!