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For those of us less fortunate enough not to be in a relationship, the coming of Christmas can present a challenge.   Let’s be honest; whether you care about your single status or not listening to relatives probing about our dating life can be draining, as can finding a home for the mountain of small amusing gifts coming your way.  For example, being in receipt of wall art or badass affirmations books and you immediately file it under a mental tab marked: Single at Christmas, again – sorted.

But there is a solution; And it’s simple –Give a gift of something to someone who needs it– Choose Love.

So, don’t shut out the idea of helping someone find love –give them a real present of love. This week, we have had several calls from people who realize that waiting patiently to let love find you does not have to be the case and this Christmas we are helping caring friends and family buy loved ones appropriate and indulgent matchmaking membership gifts, the thing that someone single actually needs; to go from single to taken!

Presents for single people truly in need; a solution to your Christmas shopping- It’s what we do.

Since you’re here, give us a call to find out more!  jane@matchmakerforhire.com

love ball and buttons  https://bigloveball.com/

 

Surprisingly forget Valentine’s Day, Halloween is the real festival of LOVE and according to psychologists they say that more people will hook up this weekend than on February 14th.

Why? Its all down to the science of fear and there is fairly good evidence that feeling afraid can trigger the same emotions as sexual arousal.   It’s a good idea to take a date to a horror movie as its acceptable to snuggle into a prospective partner shielding your eyes and that feeling afraid heightens the senses and increases attractiveness and attraction.  No wonder so many holidaymakers fall for their ski-instructors or mountain guides as its impossible to separate feelings of sexual attraction from feelings of fear. A hunky Whistler snow moose ready to help you down that scary black run, will make it so much the better.

I’m always telling my clients its important to do something that scares you every day to grow and feel fulfilled especially when it comes to dating. But this—well it’s likely to help your love life too.

 

 

 

Today, the 1st day that POT is legal in Canada, we wanted to share how serious of a deal breaker it can be when it comes to your love life.  Our data, we’ve been asking our clients for years now proves it and no, we’re not high (right now).

First things first; we discovered when it comes to dating -people are okay with their partners smoking weed…if they’re not currently using it. The most popular response was preferring their partners to have experienced the ~crazy effects~ of weed in the past, but not currently partaking.  We’ve learned a lot. And we’re continuing to learn more — about you, that is. So today, we’ve added some new pointy questions to our interview process. A few examples:

 

  • Are you 420 friendly? Medical vs casual recreational
  • Do you ever use marijuana to get ‘high’ as the equivalent to getting ‘drunk’?
  • Is smoking marijuana a fun first date?

 

I’m like the most of us, not criticizing, judging or asking to dispute it, we are just trying to imagine just how this will all play out for our clients and their criteria when it comes to matching them.

 

CONCLUSION; Weed has more to do with your love life than you think.

 

Your thoughts?

 

We have all heard the stories.  First dates costing more than $2000 after spending months of online back and forth messaging, hours of late-night phone calls, and then finally booking a flight and deciding to meet.  Such long-distance romances use to grow out of fateful encounters on holidays, or perhaps far-flung business meetings but today a growing number of cross-border courtships, some owed to an instant message across time zones, is becoming not about what to wear on your date— it’s what to pack!

Statistics show that 52% of Canadian on-line daters have e-mailed someone out of country in the past 30 days.  I have also seen a spike in Matchmaking clients open to long-distance dating; after starting out searching within five miles of their postal code and as they get more comfortable they stop limiting themselves so much and more open to step outside the “border”.

This city’s only so big, and when the girl next door is no longer next door, its nice to open up the possibilities for my clients by working with other accredited “Cupids” from other cities.  This summer I’ve relied on connections with fellow cupids from Seattle, San Fran, San Diego, New York, London UK and of course continue working with my fellow Canadian ones all the way east to Toronto with some great success.

That’s certainly the case for our affiliate Matchmaker friend Ali Migliore of Simply Matchmaking in Seattle.  “There is definitely an infinite number of single people here open to dates from other cities and this summer, I knew I had to connect with Jane about an amazing client I had in Seattle who was open to expanding her search to the Vancouver area.  By us both knowing our clients so well, we were able to come up with a great match and our clients met and both said it was the best match yet! Looking forward to dozens of more potential romances happening with the help of our cross-border cupids at Matchmaker for Hire.”

Of course, expectations are always heightened when a plane fare is actually involved and its easy to feel cheated if the romance doesn’t work out (this kind of dating isn’t for the faint of wallet) – plus there’s added pressure if it does.  But for some, however the distance is a bonus and that not being around someone all the time can be ok if you are just as busy as they are.

So, if your tolerance to being uprooted is increased, let your Matchmaker know.

 

Jane Carstens –Matchmaker for Hire- Western Cda                   

 Ali Migliore – Simply Matchmaking – Seattle

Meet Maria; She enjoys the freedom to meet her friends in the middle of the day, take Monday’s off and lives a great life in James Bay, Victoria. 

Because she believes so strongly that she needed a unique approach to find her soul mate, Maria was reluctant to try online.  Afraid she’d “sound desperate” and she didn’t want to sound like every other single person out there.  At the same time, it was difficult to find the one. Something had to change.

For her, Matchmaking was both authentic and compelling to finding the right one.

So here you go,  Meet Maria!  If you are a 60+ gent living on Vancouver Island  message me to find out more jane@matchmakerforhire.com

As seen in the Victoria Times Colonist – Sunday September 16th, 2018

 

 

It’s that summer loving that can be a blast….so perhaps it’s no real surprise that, according to Facebook, most users change their status to “Single” to mingle during the summer months.

Some say it was great while it lasted, partly because the season lent itself to tons of activities, weekends filled with weddings, barbecues, rooftop cocktail parties, or the first and last time you’ve tried to have sex on the beach! All are more opportunities as a result to meet more ‘friend of a friend’ people and date them.  Summer relationships typically do cool off in the fall, but you can’t blame the season.

My advice now that fall is approaching is to pay attention to your standards rather than just being happy you’ve met someone to go out with!

 

When a woman is off the charts, she can have any guy she wants and for some reason she is still looking for you! Well that’s what some of you might be thinking, but guys, what a gift this woman is to invite you into the next level of your glorious evolution! Take her off the pedestal, don’t get me wrong she’s a magnificent goddess and she farts like the rest of us.   Perhaps hers don’t stink but you get the picture, yes?

So, if you are looking for a great relationship, its time to get present and focus on two things:

  1. Start receiving- she’s looking for someone like you! Relationships are reciprocal, remember?
  1. There will be things she sees in you, that you don’t (yet). BE that. Exude that. Wake that up in you. Own it.

I’m sorry to say that most men (and women…..me included) are stubborn and want to ‘do it on our own’ and when we have hit the wall we are more willing to ask for help.  Well don’t wait until then, and I challenge you to not wait and to be proactive.

I would be privileged to book a time to connect with me to at least see if she is for you, attraction and connection aside.

Email me confidentially at  jane@matchmakerforhire.com   \ or call 778-552-3350   \    As seen in the Victoria Times Colonist – Saturday May 26, 2018

 

 

While you still might be tempted to have more “Netflix and Chill” nights, as the temperatures rises, endorphins spark as the sun comes out; so, does your desire for a relationship.  There is something about the days getting a little longer brings us all out of the woodworks and we are seeing a surge in singles wanting to put themselves out there to meet someone,

As spring falls upon us there are still do’s and don’ts when it comes to meeting the right kind of match, based on what you’re looking for and here are a couple of steps you can follow to meet your Spring Love;

DO lose your “laundry list”; This doesn’t mean go out with anyone who asks, but your perfect partner is never 100 percent of what you think is perfect for you that you’ve put on a piece of paper. Date smart, but date with a balance of openness.

DON’T TMI; As relaxed as you are with this great first date, trust me that he’d rather not hear about your alcoholic mother who has a bad habit of continuing asking you for money. As interesting as you think he finds it, it’s because he wants to get to know as much as possible since this is probably the last time he will see you.

DO keep it simple, stupid; Stop trying to complicate things that are not. Relax, stop overanalyzing and putting unfounded pressure on your first few dates. You’re not getting married, you are on your second date.

DON’T try too hard; Put your best foot forward, work on yourself, but remain humbly confident. Don’t ever try to be something you are not in order to try to make someone like you. No one’s perfect. Be your best YOU that you can be, and you will find that right person who loves you for you, flaws and all.

After reading these DOs and DON’Ts are you be ready to meet your Spring Love?

 Contact me jane@matchmakerforhire.com

 

“hope springs eternal meaning, definition, what is hope springs eternal: said when you continue to hope that something will happen, although it seems unlikely.”

 

Thanks to Mariah Carey and uncomfortable relatives around the festive table to have a lover at Christmas, it is the most popular time of year for singles to go searching for that special someone. Sleigh bells are ring ting tingling and for singles its time to pull out your best lines and get out there.

Now if you cave in to the cries of the dating massive, true love probably isn’t in the cards.  Matchmaking ensures you’re only exposed to like minds and people who meet your criteria. You don’t want to waste your time with someone who’s not even verified, do you? Think of how much better it will be if both you and your partner come recommended; verification that you are both important and deserving of love.

There’s plenty to celebrate about good relationships, but in a world where being single makes you feel like an oddity its time to change the focus.  Make this year the year there will be NO moping about your marital status, NO joining the festive Christmas-y stampede in the bedroom, just make the most of your alone time while it lasts.  Our clients say; once they found The One, there’s no going back to the luxury of being completely selfish, so enjoy some rum spiked noggy for the duration of the holidays.

A Partner isn’t just for Christmas – it’s for LIFE.

 

 

Throughout our lives, we compile a picture of what we think real love should look like. Often this process begins early, as little kids listening to fairy tales envisioning our very own Cinderella and Prince Charming.  As we grow older, we often imagine finding a soul-mate, that perfect person who we were destined to spend our lives with—– we set out looking for our missing piece.

The trouble is that the reality of love is not quite as simple as the picture we create in our heads. Our idea of love often leads us to choose romantic partners for the wrong reasons. The romantic, rom/com idea of “You complete me” has potentially negative implications by filling in the gaps we see in ourselves, we make assumptions and try to find a partner to fill in our self-perceived shortfalls.

Coming from a 16-year career in working with thousands of single men and women with finding love relationships, this two-part blog post will share a list of the top 5 qualities that my clients say, for them, work towards a truly loving relationship.

 

Honesty — Many believe that “Honesty is the best policy. Others say, “Discretion is the better part of valor.” Of course, being truthful is important. But are their times when you are better off not answering a new romantic partner’s questions or even, not telling the truth (the whole truth and nothing but the truth…so help you God)?  After all, during the early stages of a new relationship, it’s what you don’t say, that can allow a relationship to grow and develop unencumbered by too much information.  I’m not advocating being untruthful or lying but rather I’m suggesting that good timing and discretion should be a part of being honest in a new relationship and replies such as “that’s old history, I don’t want to get into it,” or “that’s too personal,” or “that’s from my past, I’d rather it stays buried” are more than appropriate and honest.

Affection – Its’ Complicated! Most of us have kissed someone before and we’ve seen hundreds of movies of other people kissing, and yet, when we come face-to-face with someone we find attractive, our hearts race and our minds are sent reeling. And we stall.  It sounds simple, but why is it so hard?  Generally speaking, if someone practices skiing regularly for two years, they will eventually become quite competent at it. Yet many people spend most of their lives with one romantic failure after another. Why dating and not, say, skiing?  It’s your emotional map — or at least part of it. These are the hang ups and issues that you’ve battled and slowly beaten back with years of active effort. These are the realities that are needed to express openly and seek out the proper partner who can handle them. What are yours?

Coming next week, Part 2 will highlight 3 more qualities and sum up how to work towards a truly loving relationship.  For more tips on finding true love don’t forget to check out our website blog at http://www.matchmakerforhire.com/blog/