I have noticed that for most of the singles I speak to, including me, surrendering is often the hardest thing to do.  And to be realistic, it’s hard to entirely step away from hustle-culture when you are in a life you are passionate about and a romantic relationship you want to progress in.

Well, that hustle-culture has finally hit dating.  And when things are not going the way, we wanted them to, then we give up.  We think that something is wrong with us or the person we’re meant for or the love we are desiring to find, doesn’t exist.

If this is you, imagine this VALENTINE’S DAY to consider your journey to attracting romantic love. It’s like driving, you’re on a journey and when you meet your love you’ll be excited and know that there will be detours along the way (unfavorable dates, no one calling you back, not asking you out on a second or third date, emotionally unavailable singles, etc.) and that you may have to do things differently than you had preferred, and it may take you longer to get to him/her than you expected but eventually you’ll meet and you’ll be so happy that you didn’t give up.

So, decide that from now on if your dating life is unfolding in a certain way and the only reason you are resisting is because of a personal preference, why not let go of that preference and let life be in charge.

I’m confident it’s the most powerful thing that you can do.

 

Most singles often don’t know how to express what’s going on for them when dating is not working. It might be they simply don’t understand why its not working or know how to explain it. Its like you could literally run a mile away from it, and its making single people not want to go on ANY dates.

The dating scene has completely evolved over the last decade where I have played cupid. One factor that makes dating harder is finding someone looking for the same type of relationship. Over 50% of the singles I speak to lately, indicate that this factor is a problem.  People define relationships differently, and they have different approaches to beginning one.  Trying to date someone who does not indicate wanting to take the relationship the next level can be frustrating. That is why it’s important to simply ask where someone is at and be honest with your hopes.

What if one could simply and politely say: “Hey I enjoyed spending time with you and would like to keep getting to know you” and give them an out if they’re not feeling the same way (e.g. “and yet, if you’re not interested, zero hard feelings.  I’d just like to know where you’re at”)

Who here agrees? Thoughts…

 

 

 

It’s almost Christmas time again and, to borrow the words of a famous disco hit in the 70’s “Love is in the air”.   And its a well-known fact that love is “in the air” every Christmas. It features in songs we hear as we shop, commercials we see, and present in the cards we send and the words we write on the tags we attach to the presents we give.  With Love From……

But when you read them phrase by phrase, and apply them to yourself, if you are single, they can transpose into a different key altogether. It can cease to be rhetorically pleasing and emotionally soothing;  instead, they become a deeply challenging analysis of your single life.

Perhaps that’s not what we expected this Christmas time….but when romantic love visits you again, I pray it stays till next Christmas.

 

 

 

Before retiring, she has had a long-standing career in education in Victoria and is most proud of her work volunteering. This bachelorette is spending her “go-go years” planning group hikes, listening to a all kinds of music and fun golf. After traveling to over 20 countries, and a few road trips, it’s safe to say she is looking for a travel buddy to accompany her on her travels who is kind, smart, funny, and confident.

Fun Fact; She declared her love for the Beatles from a young age. One of her highlights was seeing Paul  McCartney live in Guadalajara, Mexico where he performed nonstop for 3 hours.

 

She is genuinely searching for a late-in-life partner, 65+, who is getting the most out of their physical attributes, pushing themselves, and looking to have fun.

Interested ?  For more information please DM or email [email protected]

                                                                                         

One word:  LOVE —  It’s ingrained in my mind and heart and guides my thinking, everyday.

But for some singles, it can feel like a hard word.  Which can actually be good for you, as it can give cause to stop, pause and think, “Love”.  Even when it’s hard and feels almost unattainable like a pie-in-the-sky kind of emotional crutch,  in your world.

Which is why I’m thankful in knowing in no uncertain terms what love looks like.

Here’s what I have learned;

  • Sometimes love looks like waiting,
  • Sometimes love looks like listening,
  • Sometimes love makes us uncomfortable,
  • Sometimes love is exhausting.

And yet LOVE continues toward the purpose it was given.

 

Can you explain LOVE in one sentence ?

 

                                                                     

We are on the search for a Vancouver Bachelor for our Vancouver Bachelorette.

 

Meet Bachelorette B, a fun loving, smart educational professional in her 30’s.  Brimming with positive energy and intellectual curiosity, she enjoys reading, drinking coffee and is active in sailing, cycling, and running on the seawall with her dog.  Bachelorette B is a nurturing woman who loves cooking for her friends. She is funny , kind, adventurous and is a real gem!

 

Her ideal matches are guys 35-45, who are smart, genuinely kind, funny, quirky guys.  She’s very open and wants to fall in love with his brain and would like to have a family. Prefer Vancouver area (but lower mainland ok too).

Interested ?  For more information please DM or email [email protected]

 

 

                                                                     

If you are turned on by intelligence, you’re a sapiosexual. If this describes you, and you are looking for a partner, here is a few tips that are essential.

  • You reach out on a dating app or on a face-to-face 1st date and try to get past the small talk as quickly as possible. Whilst other people  wade into talk about the weather, you just dive right into it. This will be the best conversations to assess their intellectual interests and whether it’s a match for you.
  • Don’t worry about seeming too nerdy. Go right ahead and geek out over board games, trivia nights and other stimulating activities. It’s a vibe that will attract like-minded partners.
  • And the clients I speak to say the attraction was less about having an advanced degree than about someone’s perspective or curiosity.  Its entirely subjective and its no different from saying I’m attracted to brunette girls, or tall guys. Its not some sort of strict rule.  Its just an indicator of what you know about yourself in terms of what tends to push our buttons in order to feel attraction.

Of course, you still will have to go on a few dates to find someone you’re attracted to, but once you do, you might find you have those core values in line with the other person.

Never apologize for what you are attracted to—–we like what we like!

 

 

Dating at any age is awkward, scary and often a pain. True, being in the over-60 group may mean that more people your age are already off the market, however after 20 years as a matchmaker and myself in my mid- 60’s, the mature dating pool isn’t dismal, even if all the apps seem like they are.

Meet Jerry Turner. This Golden Bachelor who is a father of two and grandfather of two, is a “hopeless romantic”.  He’s looking for someone to  “share the sunset years of life” and has realized that life is just too short to play games and he realizes  dating is different than it was 50 years ago. While there is no real matchmaking algorithm with the niche Bachelor spin-off show, he remains positive about his prospects, saying he “has nothing to lose”. Whether he would get married again, he shared “I wouldn’t discount it!”

In reality people over 60 are finding love everyday.

 

 

Dating takes resilience.  And the more opportunities you give yourself, the better the chances you’ll find that person.  So maybe its not so surprising and even more encouraging that 90% of the singles I speak to who believe in true love say they know this because they have experienced it.  It’s the strongest emotion we’ll ever feel. So, I set off and researched what professors are saying.  So here you go;

Scientists say that there are three stages of love- lust, romantic obsession, and long-term attachment. 

Stage 1; Let’s start with LUST (who wouldn’t) and that took me to the beach at spring break in Fort Lauderdale….can you relate?

Stage 2; Romantic obsession, or attraction. You’re obsessed, it takes over your whole life, like a state of need, you can’t eat, sleep, or think straight. Sounds like a scene from a movie.  Can’t imagine a world with everyone in that state of romantic obsession. We’d all be nuts.

Stage 3; Which is why, with any luck, romantic obsession becomes Attachment. So, I reconnected with a couple I matched 20 years ago, that was certainly still attached with a combined 4 children, 15 grandchildren, and a couple of great grandchildren.

I came away from this with a renewed sense that true love does really exist. Part of being a matchmaker is, you know, trying to solve the unsolvable. What brings two singles together? What makes people stay together?  I guess there are no real-life answers as there is there is no research on the work that it takes to sustain it over a long period of time. I’m not sure why, maybe because it boring!!!!….like the day in and day out of who’s getting the toilet paper.

 

Your comments?

contact [email protected] 

Everyone who has used a dating app or website knows that you can get incredibly exhausted of scrolling through profiles and sending messages. And it takes even more time to investigate and VERIFY  that someone isn’t exaggerating or just flat out lying.

If you are a discerning dater, why waste your time?

On the other hand, your matchmaker (a real person) will give you real, VERIFIED information after vetting each match for you.  That helps eliminate blind spots about the person you are about to meet and no more getting involved in the verification process.

Do you think singles should have to verify their identification to meet you ? You decide!

 

Message me if you are interested in joining our MATCHMAKER VERIFIED  active database ?

Which BTW….costs nothing to join.

[email protected]